As our time for leaving Numbulwar draws closer I find myself living in an interesting dichotomy. I am going through the process of beginning to distance myself from this place, while wearing rose coloured glasses.
I think it is normal that as we face leaving a place, a home, we begin to detach ourselves from all that is around us. For me I have noticed this change in thinking has occurred as I find myself looking forward to the end of many of the struggles and dislikes about this place. We have struggled with a bathroom sink with no hot water for eighteen months, more of a challenge for Jason than me. Doesn’t make shaving easy…. Perhaps that is why he often has a beard. Our house has very weak water pressure and the bore water leaves you feeling sticky instead of clean on many days. So showers aren’t too much fun. We have had two break-ins in two weeks, which leaves us frustrated and perhaps a little glad that we won’t have this stress for too much longer. It is not nice to have to wonder what your house will look like when you next return home. All of these things are minor inconveniences to life. They would never make us leave here, but things that frustrate us and can get us down if we choose to let them. Normally we try not to think about these issues and just get on with life… but as we approach our time of saying goodbye to Numbulwar, I find myself being a little excited about saying goodbye to these struggles too.
But I have realised that while I am rejoicing about the end of some of my Numbulwar struggles, I am also walking through each day with a pair of very rosey coloured glasses. Wearing rose coloured glasses is the state of seeing colours more brightly and everything more rose-ily and gloriously than they really are. As I go through my days I am enjoying and treasuring those things I love here, trying to sear faces, sounds and sights into my heart and mind for days and years to come. Suddenly many things seem sweeter and so much more precious. I have found myself enjoying and being thankful for conversations with friends. My heart is so glad as I see Sam’s interactions with local friends. And I wonder how my menu planning will survive the loss of Jason’s steady supply of freshly caught fish. I find myself choosing to spend more time each day out on our deck just soaking in the view of the Gulf which has been my daily reminder of God’s presence and creativity here in this remote corner of the world. I know my view of the sea will be one of the things I will miss the most about this place. I have found myself singing and dancing around the house more often as the church ladies sing and practise their dances. We will miss this place.